Random Writing… Repost from 9.3.14

30 Layers…30 Days… Self Discovery! Days 1 – 3

So, I am participating in this challenge: 30 layers… 30 days! It has already been interesting.  I love how the creator of this challenge makes you actually think.  It’s a good reflection tool and just a good way to get to know YOU better!  Below are the first three days of the challenge… So far it’s been very interesting! 🙂 Enjoy the read and if you are inclined to do so join the challenge!

Day 1: Start. Stop. Continue.

Start: What do you want to start doing? What do you want more of in your life? What feelings, what activities, what energy? What baby steps can you take today? I want to start doing more volunteering with youth or less fortunate.  There is so much to want in life but ultimately I want to live knowing that I have left an impact on many lives.  I love the feeling I get after mentoring or volunteering.  I would love to start doing more things outside of my comfort zone. J  I’ll make a pledge to start incorporating one new activity per month into my schedule.

Stop: What have you had enough of? What are you tolerating or feeding into that is not adding value to your life? What area of your life is begging for more boundaries? I’ve had enough of people letting me down.  Sometimes, I tolerate people’s subpar behavior because of our relationship.  They are a family member, a life-long friend.  I need more boundaries with having expectations of others in my life.  This is the quickest way for me to be disappointed.

Continue: What habits or trends do you want to continue? What’s been working for you? What can you do to ensure you keep it going?  My number habit to continue is running! It’s my sanity when I’m insane.  My ME time when I need it most! It is my outlet to release any negative that may be taking its toll on me.  It is my praying time and my alone time with nature!  Writing is my other outlet.  Both running and writing has been working for me.  I’m sure both will continue.  I always make time for both.  I will rearrange my schedule to ensure I get both done when I feel a need for it! J

Day 2: Joy Snatchers (Narrow it down to your #1.  What can you do to minimize or eliminate this influence? More importantly, do you know and believe that you have the power to do so?) Sometimes, joy snatchers are so small that I really shouldn’t give much thought to it.  I’m very impatient and sometimes I don’t see the humor in things.  I’m not anal or an asshole but I honestly don’t get the joke sometimes.  I think I can take life a little too serious at times.  I think my number one joy snatcher is expecting people to behave or think as I would.  Okay, let me clarify.  I’m not saying that everyone will do as I do or maybe I am.  This is very contradictory.  I just know that I expect to find the things that I find important just as important to them.  The older I get the more I realize we all have different priorities.  Sometimes, I have a hard time understanding why people do AB&C in situations XY&Z.  I need to move past this and accept that people handle the same situation differently.  More importantly, I need to let people make mistakes and learn from life’s experiences.  The best way for me to eliminate this joy snatcher is to accept that not everyone will prioritize what I find important or approach a situation the same as I will.  Yes, I HAVE THE POWER to change this! Every day, I work on becoming more acceptable and know that I realize it’s a joy snatcher I will be even more conscious of it. J

Day 3: Favorite Mistake (What mistake have you learned the most from?) This is a really hard one.  I thought on it and thought on it.  My favorite mistake probably isn’t really a mistake.  I learned the most about ME when I became selfishly concerned about my needs before others. Now, I don’t necessarily think it was a mistake but my approach may have included a few mistakes.  I woke up one morning and decided I was tired of being the always available child, sibling, aunt, cousin, friend and girlfriend.  I was becoming a crutch for so many people.  And while doing so, I was stressing and worrying myself over things that others cared nothing about.  I WAS OVER IT!!!! I decided I was a priority and I was tired of being treated like an option.  So, I began focusing on me and what do you know I didn’t really know myself.  I’ll admit it was lonely at first but then I learned how to enjoy my own company.  I didn’t always need to be handling business for someone or solving their problems.  I did more of the things that made me happy… Running! Writing! Cooking! Planning! Playing dress up! Dancing! *I CAN’T DANCE AT ALL*  Needless to say, I fell in love with me all over again! I was my best “mistake”.  I lost a few people that shouldn’t have been on my team anyway.  When I stop benefitting them I was no longer needed in their lives.  Oh well!!! I’m happy and I continue to make my happiness a priority.  I’m selfishly making me happy! And while I’m doing so I continue to learn so much about myself.  Soul searching has been fun, scary and necessary.  I didn’t really know who I was but I knew who I needed to be for everyone else.  It was a relief to be there for me when I needed me the most.  It sounds weird but it’s the truth.  Since selfishly making my happiness a priority I’ve been less stressed and a lot easier to deal with… I even started dating.  Now, that hasn’t been the best experience but I’m hopeful! J



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