Domestic Violence… Why is Ray Rice different?

I am in no way condoning domestic violence or making excuses.  I would like to point out several things though.  I’m not sure why so many of us are in an uproar about the whole Ray Rice situation.  Is it unfortunate and sad? Of course, it is.  However, all of us know someone directly or indirectly that deals with domestic violence.  Okay, what’s the difference?  The difference is Ray Rice’s dispute happens to be caught on camera and he’s a professional athlete.  He’s no different from the others that put their hands on their significant others.  When I say others I mean women as well.  Let’s take this point by point…

1. Women shouldn’t be allowed to hit men either.  You know in kindergarten that simple concept of keeping your hands to yourself? Yea, that applies in the real world as well.

2. Ray’s wife, who was only a fiancee at the time, obviously had no issues with him knocking her out.  She stayed around and said, “I Do”.

3. Domestic violence takes place daily and the defendant does not suffer these consequences.  Oh maybe because he/she is just a regular person.  At some point, we have to stop holding these professional athletes and celebrities to higher standards.  They are human and will make mistakes.

4.  If this was a GM or team owner, how would the consequences be different? I’m sure their significant others experience all types of abuse.  We can’t pick and choose who gets what consequences.  Oh wait, actually we can.  It should be fair and consistent.

5. The media and social media has no boundaries for people’s personal lives.  But then some of you are arguing that it was a public matter bc it happened in the elevator.  SMHL! If your boyfriend knocks you up side the head in WalMart does it become a public matter or will you still want it to be private?

6.  It is sad that a man’s career comes to an end *even if it’s temporary* because of a domestic dispute BUT a man can kill an unarmed, black kid and remain employed while the investigation is ongoing.

7. I DO NOT CONDONE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE… PHYSICALLY, EMOTIONALLY, VERBALLY OR ANY OTHER NATURE!  I ALSO DO NOT CONDONE THE KILLING OF UNARMED, BLACK CHILDREN! Yet, both happen.

8.  The root of the problem needs to be addressed.  It goes deeper than what is seen on the video or what others tell their friends.  Why does one stay in these situations? What can we teach our children to help them understand this is not okay?

9. We teach our children contradictory things.  If someone hits you, you hit them back.  We teach our boys not to hit girls.  It’s okay for women to defend themselves but men can’t.  Once again the simple concept of keeping your hands to yourself is best.

10. We have to teach our young children, men and women how to handle their anger.  Anger management 101 is just as important as money management 101.

I can only pray that Ray and his wife have better days to come! Love doesn’t cause you pain… physically or emotionally!!  We have to teach our children (boys and girls) this. These are just my opinions though!

 

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